i tried to let you go. i thought i had done a good enough job of not letting you affect me. but in the end, my insecurities still got the best of me. my insecurities reminded me that despite all that i have and all that i do, i'm still worth nothing in your eyes. because at the end of the day, you didn't choose me. and maybe it's my pride and my ego that's speaking the loudest. but it's telling me that i will forever be inferior to her.
and through and through, i don't want to feel this way. i don't want to be reminded of my insecurities. because my insecurities foster my anxiety and i want to be anxious no more. i'm starting it all off now by force shutting you out. i'm going to use every fiber of my being to rid of you in my life. ctrl-alt-del you out of my life.
out of sight, out of mind. i'll check back in a few months with updates.