I can't help it

We are always taught to love me for me. Don't wait on others to love you or else you'll never be happy. No one can love you more than you love yourself and all that bullshit. I acknowledge it and I realize that it's most important to abide by this. But at the same time, I can't seem to follow it. Not that I'm saying I need justification for why I should love myself, but low-key I do, ok? Maybe I'm actually just too bored right now and need to find some other source of self-fulfillment or self-entertainment. I know I shouldn't be waiting on some boy to come by, swoop me off my feet, and tell me how much he loves me. But a girl can't help but wonder those types of things yakno? I need a hobby.

Lessons

I spent the month of October learning and growing. I learned that I didn't have to waste energy or time on someone who didn't deserve it. I didn't need another person in my life to make myself happy. And I could definitely do better than chasing pavements. I shouldn't have to invest myself into something that probably will never amount to anything. I also need to start pulling myself out of feelings before I allow myself to be consumed by them. Thanks to my good for nothing addictive personality, I really need to start watching myself. No person is worthy of this much pain and misery.