To the you who's been there for me since my break up whether you were emotionally invested or not - thank you. You've helped me through some of the loneliest times of my 2016 and made me a happier person. You have a fucked up perception of relationships and love and although you can't seem to let people who need to be let go, go, I still thank you for the time you've spent with me.
It's been immensely painful since I've found out that we weren't headed down the same road and were probably never were since the very beginning but that's my own pain. It's got nothing to do with you.
But I'm trying this thing where I'm going to be optimistic. I don't want to dwell on being sad but rather look to the unlimited possibilities of the future. I know you still want to be friends (and I do too), but I just don't know if now is the time to do so. Without that physical relationship, what are we really? I don't know. I haven't ever been "just friends" with you and I don't know how to start now.
So I think I'm going to just take a break from you and everything. You've made it very clear since the last time we've talked that you and I aren't on the same page. And since there's only one of two roads to take, I've decided to take the higher one. A sharp pain for now is much better than prolonged hurting in the future - which I know will happen one way or another.
I look forward to the day where I don't involuntarily search for your name across all my social media channels or feel a twinge of pain in my chest because I still remember all the times we've had. I look forward to the day where I can think about you with other people and I will genuinely smile because I know that you're happy and I am happy because we're both at good places in our lives. I yearn for the moment where I can think back on the memories we've had and rather than feel sad because I miss you so much, feel nothing because it was a short-lived yet meaningless chapter of my life story.
Just hoping and praying that this day comes soon.